Walt's Journey

I am not sure how it happened, but I feel completely overwhelmed with stuff. I feel as though it would be too much even for a non open heart surgery patient. I am trying really hard to hand my burden’s over to the only one that can help me through them. I could list everything that is adding so much pressure on me, but that’s not necessary, and many of them are personal.

The fact that I will always have sever medical conditions is at times too much to think about. There are moments, though few, that I forget about the surgery, the pain, etc. However, very quickly something reminds me of reality. I am not ready to accept that I am not even close to where I was before the dissection. I have grown in so many ways through this trial, but I am still human, and because of that, I cannot seem to accept everything quite yet. I so badly want to be able to say boldly what Hezekiah said after being freed from certain death in Isaiah 38:17 – “Surely it was for my benefit that I suffered such anguish”.

The pain in my leg is gone. Once in a while I feel a slight tweak in that area, and it scares me. The pain was indescribable. It consumed me. There was a time that the pain started to subside several weeks ago, but then it came back as painful as ever, so I don’t feel out of the woods with it yet. I am praying that it is indeed healing, and will not come back. I am anxious to get back on my bike, and exercise.

Last night the travel baseball team that I am coaching had a fundraiser at a local restaurant. I knew that I would have to be moving around a lot, and using my loud voice. I managed quite well, but was extremely tired afterwards. Some of my family and a couple of my friends came and showed their support. Discouragement overshadows encouragement many times, so little things such as the showing of support through this fundraiser means a lot to me. For those that were there for me, and you know who you are, I appreciate it more than you know.

I am two days away from a meeting in Ann Arbor with my Cardiologist and Surgeon group. We will go over the results of my Echo Cardio Gram, and CAT scan from my ICU visit on New Year’s Day. This appointment is going to be important in determining where I am and where I am heading in my recovery.

I want to again thank those that reach out to me often. I know I stress this point a lot, but this is my blog, and I am allowed to over emphasize anything that I want to.